I promised myself I wouldn't cry...

The following isn't so much sappy as it is gushy, but even that descriptor will likely turn you away. If you want a better insight into who I stalk or wish I could stalk, read on. If you'd rather not be an accomplice, read some old post, or maybe the one above this. It's up to you, I don't control your eyes and mind.

The two people I look towards to the most in this industry have left the nest, and are building new, fancier ones elsewhere. Both Jeff Green (former editor-in-chief of Computer Gaming World/Games for Windows Magazine) and Shawn Elliott (former editor of GFW and aspects of 1Up) have left 1Up.com, leaving me searching for a new subject of admiration. But, I don't think anyone can fill their shoes.

Since I'm a journalism student and am hoping to somehow become a video game journalist (in a way that wouldn't require me to move to America's west coast), I couldn't have bound a better pair to influence how I write. Both in their work and their podcasts, I was able to scrounge together a list of do-not commandments. Going against these words would send me to journalism hell, where I would toil with the likes of rumour mongerers and message board trolls. I admit that before I knew of these two, I would litter my work with cliches and phrases that wore out alongside "All your base" jokes. But with their tales of unpublished works and industry embarassments, I was able to write something that meant a lot more to me.

Jeff Green was (and still is over at his new blog) able to talk about a game like no one else. It was like he existed somewhere where the hype and anxiety behind a game's release didn't factor in, and he could just play the damn thing. You didn't have to hear about how awful the Wii was, or why the PC version was obviously superior. Instead you got just what you needed to hear; whether the game was good or not. And that was something I will always admire. Sometimes I can get caught up in the balogna surrounding a game's release, or criticize what the majority thinks of it. But Green was like condensed soup, you got all you need in as little a product as possible.

Shawn Elliott was able to make me laugh. But he was also able to make me think and observe a lot more than I'd ever thought of. His writing was just so unique, and that's why I worry we won't be able to enjoy it as much as before. When I first heard him mention he used to write for EGM, I dug out my old issues to hunt down some of his work. It's hard to describe, but he's able to make it seem like he's writing about something else, when really he's been talking about Game Y the whole time. It's a style I've never seen emulated anywhere, and while we're better off for that, it's also sad to see no one else put out that same effort Elliott has.

So with Shawn over at 2K Boston (working with Bioshock creator Ken Levine) and Jeff at the Sims team over at EA, it's a bit scary. When will they ever be able to write and speak like they did at 1Up? Is it even possible? Or will they be treated like the Gap employee who can't smoke outside because they now represent the store? And with the industry working as it does, the person you bemoan today could be your boss tomorrow.

No matter what happens, their happiness is most important. Screw what I want. I wouldn't want anyone condemning my decisions, and I would never do the same.

Best of luck to Shawn and Jeff, hopefully we continue to hear from them.